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6/30/2007 Funny How Things HappenI was just changing channels on the tv, meaning to press 44 for Animal Planet, but ended up with a third "4" and up came the area of stations (I have cable, obviously lol) that have a wide variety of nothing but constant music... each channel by theme. Flipped around a bit and found "Classical Masterpieces" and they were playing Ravel at that moment. So began the memories. In high school I had a friend whose parents had the Bolero album by Ravel. But MY favorite piece on it was called "Pavan for a Dead Princess". She let me have it, and I played that piece over and over until every note and every instrument was crystal clear in memory. From there my mind wandered to a birthday when i was very young... perhaps 7 or 8? I remember it as if it were yesterday. The "party" was just family... mom, dad and grandma (aHA... i must have been younger than 7 because my sister wasn't there lol). Anyway, after dinner and the cake and ice cream it was time for my present. I was told to close my eyes (oh wow - is this the year i'm getting a horse? Of course not... we lived in Levittown, but i couldn't let go of the dream lol). The next thing I knew, there was music playing... and my heart LEAPED because I recognized it instantly. It was the Grand Canyon Suite by Graffe. For the life of me, I cannot tell you now how i was already familiar with that.
I'm 56 now, and still have not yet had a horse of my own (it WILL happen someday). But it seems that for my entire life, music (in it's many ways that notes and instruments are put together by gifted people) has been a part of me. There is music that I can use as markers in my life... I hear it and it takes me back to a time when some event happened, or someone was in my life. Then there is music that simply brings on a flood of emotion just because of how it SOUNDS, there are no words to describe its beauty, and it can carry me to places that don't exist in the physical realm. I love sooooo many kinds of music. If anyone were to see my collection of it, they might think i'm schizophrenic lol. But it all feeds me in some way. There's some that, by the time the last note is finished, I'm physically exhausted from the rush of emotions. And then some that leave me unable to move, either because I'm stilll wrapped up in a memory, or just because it was so beautiful, each moment of hearing it remains alive in me.
I'm a sucker for really sad music. Sure, there are songs sung that are "sad", and I love alot of those too. But mostly it's instrumental pieces, and alot of it is obscure stuff that no one else I know has heard. There's one piece I know millions probably heard, but maybe didn't really notice at the time. Peter Jennings was covering the funeral procession of Princess Dianna, and at times in the background there was this hauntingly beautiful music that just grabbed my soul. And so began my search to find out what it was, who composed it, and how I could get it. I wrote to ABC network a few times (to different departments) and was finally put in touch with the woman who "put together" that part of the program. I think all she could tell me was that it was the theme from a movie called "Black Beauty". Now, there have been ALOT of versions of this movie lol, and I can't remember if she was able to tell me the composer was Danny Elfman. But I had enough information to find it. Turned out he had it (and more pieces from that movie, just as beautiful) on a compilation CD called something like "Music for a Darkened Theater", and it had to be specially ordered by a co worker who also worked in a music store. Danny has also scored alot of major movies, and I've read that the Black Beauty music was somewhat of a departure from his "regular" way of composing. So I am forever grateful to the powers that be, who had me watching that tv station at that particular moment in time, for something that still, after all these years, brings me immense pleasure. (ok let's try this http://www.amazon.com/Music-Darkened-Theatre-Vol-Television/dp/samples/B000002P4P/ref=dp_tracks_all_2/102-8568058-3924132?ie=UTF8&qid=1183229677&sr=1-2#disc_2 tracks 16 thru 22 ... might have to scroll up to get to DISC ONE)
The second one that I consider some of the most beautful music I've ever heard in my life, was found in a somewhat similar way. Way back around 1971 I lived on a mountain in an isolated area. For some reason, my then husband was not home one particular night, and on the tv I came upon the movie "Jane Eyre" with George C. Scott and Susannah York. Again, a movie made countless times. Lucky for me, the credits helped by showing John Williams as the composer. He is now very famous, having scored so many major movies (just do a search on him). However, this particular soundtrack is not always listed in his discographies, and is now out of print. It took me about a year back in '71/72 to find the album, and I saw recently where it can be bought but it's very expensive online lol. Unfortunately, my album was destroyed along with all my others when my ex knocked over one of those "Damp Rid" containers on a closet shelf... and the liquid spilled over my entire album collection. He never said a word about it to me... I wonder why lmao. With the help of the computer, I have been able to find a couple of tracks, and now have them in my online collection (of course I burned them to a cd, along with those pieces of Danny's). Anyway, for years I've wanted to write to John Williams, to thank him for that music. I am done "wanting to"... it's time to DO it, some how, some way.
(an edit... wow hope this works... will someone let me know? http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000026CHZ/ref=cm_syf_opt_pop_7/102-8568058-3924132 scroll down some to hear it... and it's not as expensive as i thought. well hey... some things are just priceless lol)
I wish now I had taken music courses in school, I wish that we had owned a piano when I was growing up, I wish that there hadn't been a shortage of violins at school the year I wanted to learn to play it. Music comes into my head, put together with all the different instruments doing their part, but I have no way... no skill... to capture what I hear in my mind. Music, I believe, comes to certain individuals from the universe, and those who have the gift of sharing it with the world are so blessed, and I thank them all from the depths of my heart.
 6/27/2007 Odds n Ends...Stuff that there isn't any other place to put. And it'll probably be updated now and then.
Favorite Comdedians: (in no particular order)
Robin Williams
Gallagher
Steven Wright
Roseanne Barr (but only when she did standup)
George Carlin
Howie Mandell (back when he DID standup)
David Brenner
Steve Martin
Bill Cosby (the old days)
Favorite Authors
Vine DeLoria
Robert Fulghum
Steven Hawking
Memories
9/15/07... Been to that place called "nostalgia" for awhile since noon, thinking about the time I lived in and near New Paltz NY. The town (village, actually) of New Paltz was the first place I lived "away from home" (mom and dad) when I got married in 1969. Mostly known for the university there, at that time it was a pretty cool place to be. We had an apartment on the edge of town, with the Walkill river as our view out the living room window. The river was just the other side of Huguenot Street, which was immediately behind our place. I used to love walking on that street... ALOT of history there, with old stone houses built in the 1600's. Now and then I'd visit the cemetary (nobody "new" was buried there lol), with headstones dating back to the 1500's (I think). I can't describe the energy I felt there - it was eerie, haunting... yet.. I want to say "beautiful" but that's not quite right. Where Hugeunot St. met Main St. was where the bridge was over the river, that led to "the flats" - farmland and woods, leading up to the mountains (Shawangunk) and cliffs. Little did I know then that I'd soon be living on that mountain at the base of those cliffs.
(I'm not into "people bashing", but it needs to be said here that I was married to a guy that simply didn't want to work. That fact played a major role in how life went back then.) I found out I was pregnant a second time (the first was the reason I was married, but lost that one two weeks after the courthouse wedding). He had been doing some handywork around the apartments, but by October of 1970 we could no longer afford the rent. I'd had to quit my job at the bank due to constant and severe "morning sickness". Somehow we found out about a little place up on the mountain that was for rent... about $125 a month. It was on North Mountain Rd up from the town called Gardiner. The rental was on property belonging to a very wealthy couple that lived on Park Avenue in NYC. The "Big house", built in the 1700's was their "summer place", and had been broken into a couple of times, so they wanted someone living on the property full time. So we moved in to what had been considered the guest house/childrens playhouse lol. Their local handyman & pool guy, Fred, had finished it off, closing in walls and installing electricity. It soon became apparent that Fred didn't quite know what he was doing. Taking a shower in the metal stall, I'd get shocked every time. And when we got the first electric bill, it was over $100... unheard of back then, and we couldn't pay it. So the power company shut it off, and that's how it stayed the whole time we lived there. Did I tell you we had no phone either?
I'll tell ya what - you find out pretty fast who your friends really are when you live in a house waaayyy up on the mountain with no heat in the winter time rofl. When temps got really low, and wearing everything we owned still didn't keep us warm, we'd go up to the big house and build a fire in the fireplace just to thaw out. Being the caretakers, we had a key, and the Alexanders (the propetry owners) never said anything (they RARELY if ever came up there in winter anyway).
There was one neighbor down the road some, and I never much cared for his company, but he and his wife let us use their phone in emergencies. Like the freezing cold night in February when I was going to have my baby. To this day I am grateful for the fact that our car, a little Sunbeam Alpine that only ran when it felt like it, DID run that night (it was very, very OLD). I decided we should stop in town and look for a female friend of ours (she was husbands best friends girlfriend) to keep him company once we got to the hospital. I finally found her at about the third bar we stopped at ("we" stopped, but he wouldn't get out of the car, so I navigated walking over the frozen snow lol), and so off went the three of us (or should I say four lmao) in this teensy tiny little car (of course with no heat lol).
Ok. I'm doing it AGAIN... drifting way off, going into too many details lol. So, back to just "living on the mountain"...
It was beautiful up there. The property had 88 acres of woods. Altho it was copperhead country, I never saw one, even tho the abandoned pool acrioss the road was infested with them (THAT pool was too far for the owners to walk with their drinks to lmao). There was a very nice pool behind the big house where we could skinny dip to our hearts content, sometimes with friends. I had the chance once to shoot a musket - or black powder gun, that literally knocked me on my ass lol. And omg I almost forgot... our first night living there was when we discovered, during deep sleep, that outside our bedroom window was a deer run. I thought it was thunder or a rockslide or something lol.
As is so often the case in life, there were tradeoffs. In addition to no electricty, there was also no MONEY. Those were the days of not knowing how or when the next meal was coming. Kraft mac n cheese was 27 cents a box (we had to get the more expensive Deluxe so we didn't have to buy the milk to go in the cheaper kind), and for a very long period of time, that was our one meal a day. When the car wasn't running, and we needed stuff, I had to walk about 5 miiles just to get to a road I could start hitchhiking from, since we were so isolated (what... you thought HE would go??? rofl). And while I was pregnant, everything I ate went to the baby. After I had him, i was 35 pounds lighter than before I was pregnant lol. The Alexanders would pay the husband to do odd jobs now and then, so $25 was like winning the lottery, and I made it go a loooooong ways. Then there was his mother, who would send a bit of money now and then too (MY parents, on the other hand, refused to hand anything out as long as I was married to this guy... but THEY were the ones who had said "you WILL marry him..."). In any case, the baby NEVER went hungry.
Sigh... I think about those days now and then. Walking outside early in the morning to start a fire so I could heat the baby's bottle, the air so crisp... so clean... no noise from traffic or neighbors... sometimes I can still HEAR the snow fall..........................
11/22/07 Looking thru the photo album "Places I've Been", it just breaks my heart to think that if I went back to the Grand Tetons today, the glaciers on them would probably be gone.
 6/18/2007 "Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee"... the movieIf anyone is interested in reading the "fallout" since this movie first aired, go to the HBO homepage, click at top on "HBO Films", scroll down a bit and on the left choose the movie title. Once at that page, near top right is "community"... click on that for some interesting viewpoints. Aw hell... this will get you close... http://www.hbo.com/films/burymyheart/index.html
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Toksa ake ~~~ |
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